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So, its been a while since I’ve done any kind of update…the problem is, I don’t have internet at my house and I work 40+ hours a week, so I’m always too tired to go find/steal internet from somewhere else.¬† The only time I get internet is at my bartending job on Wednesday nights (where I am right now), but I only have time to get on if it’s not too busy.¬† I plan on moving to a new house in February, so internet will no longer be an issue.¬† I promise there is a video coming soon!¬† Sorry, about the inconsistency.

So, last night my sweetheart and I decided to check out the famed Country Night at East End in Chapel Hill.¬† I was expecting…Country Night: a chance for college greeks¬†to shed their layers of khakis and polos¬†to LARP (live-action-role-play) in¬†plaid and boots.¬†¬†BUT here’s a curve ball for ya, I think there were more european gay men at country night than there were actual countrypeople.¬† I think “Country Night” must be a well-known, city-wide pseudonym for: Skinny Jeans-Cute Curly Mofro¬†(just another word for frohawk) Haircuts-Aldo¬†Boots-and Sexy Gay Germans in Muscle Shirts-Night.¬† I didn’t hear a single country song all night, but the DJ was actually pretty sick.¬† OVERALL, the music was good, the crowd was fun (with the usual creepy-old-man, and way-too-drunk-fratboy exceptions), the beer was cheap, and I’ll definitely be attending “Country Night” again.

I bring up country night, because last night made me realize that society has a new opinion of me.¬† No longer am I seen as a woman, I’m not viewed as a lesbian, I’m not viewed as pre-pubescent boy…I am now assumed a GAY MAN.¬† I can’t say I didn’t see this coming.¬†

I am an effeminate man.¬† Not gay, but very effeminate and its no surprise to me that I get hit on by more gay men than any other identity.¬† I’m okay with it, I’m very awkward about it, but I’m alright with it.

While walking to country night, Hannah and I passed through a circle of drunk guys.¬† Real manly-mans¬†(1. Gross¬† 2.¬† what is a manly-man anyways?).¬† Hilarious to them, one of them yelled out “HEY LADIES” as we walked by…my thought progression:

EEEEEWWWWWW
Don’t talk to my girlfriend like that!
Wait, did he just call me a lady?
I haven’t been mistaken for a girl in almost a month and a half…
*SAD*
Wait, there’s NO WAY he thinks I’m a girl.¬† Cause I’m not.
*ANGRY*
OOOOHHHH, he thinks I’m a gay boy!!!
*HAPPY*
Wait, even though he recognized me as a boy, he was still trying to make fun of me.
Damn it.

So, I am very happy to be seen as a man (even a gay one!), but I’m also beginning to understand a whole new set of struggles.¬† I always thought that most discrimination¬†I will experience¬†will be due to my transgenderism, but now discrimination against gay men is becoming more relevant to me.¬† Interesting.